With No One Left All My Screaming Has Gone Unheard
by DrawerDiary
Summary: Book Two of the Evanescence Chronicles. Hikaru is trying to avoid everyone at school, but his fan girls are having none of that. Running away and trying to find refuge, Hikaru finds himself back in the third music room. And running into a familiar face.
1. Chapter 1: Weight of the World

**Evanescence: **_(noun)_ 1. The act or state of vanishing away; disappearance; the event of fading and gradually vanishing from sight

2. An American alternative rock band founded in Little Rock, Arkansas in 1998 by singer Amy Lee and former guitarist Ben Moody. 

_Feels like the weight of the world,_

_Like God in heaven gave me a turn._

Hikaru walked down the empty hallways of the school, listening to the quiet murmurs of the classrooms. He debated weather or not he should go to his. 'Not that I could concentrate on anything.' he thought briefly and kept walking. He didn't really pay attention to where he was going, or even what time it was. **Rrrriiiiinnnnnnggg!!** Hikaru jumped when the bell snapped him out of his daze. He looked at his watch only to realize that it was lunch time. 'Great.' he thought sarcastically. Students poured themselves out of the classrooms, only to start crowding him when they realized he was there. He felt both his arms being taken hostage from some of his fan girls. They had tears in their eyes as they clung to the savior of the broken brotherly love duo.

_Don't cling to me, I swear I can't fix you_

"Let go." Hikaru growled, making the girls flinch. He pulled himself out of their grip adn ran out of the crowd. He knew showing up was a mistake. All he kept getting was looks pity from people who thought they understood him, but they didn't. No one understood! How could they? What he and Kaoru had was special, a bond that was not like any other. No one could understand what it was like to lose their other self. Their better self. They were all blind if they thought they could be of any help to him.

_Still in the dark, can you fix me?_

_Freefall, freefall, all through life_

Hikaru ran. He didn't know where he was going. He didn't care. He just had to get away. Away from all the stares, the murmurs. Away from the people who thought they were helping him but in reality, were only helping themselves. 'Hikaru!!" cried some of his distraught fan girls as he turned a corner and ran into them. They clung into him immediately and started to cry. "It's alright Hikaru!" one of them said. "You don't have to be alone any longer Hikaru!" "That's right, we love you! And we're here for you!"

"Let go of me!" he said trying to get out of their grasp. He couldn't handle their fake love right at the moment.

"But Hikaru you need to open up!" "Kaoru wouldn't want you to grieve forever!" "That's right! He'd want you to go back to who you were before the accident!" Hikaru glared at them all. He couldn't take this.

"I said let me go!!" He yelled louder and pulled one arm free.

_If you love me, then let go of me._

_I won't be held down by who I used to be._

_She's nothing to me._

He pulled his other arm out and started running. So what is he changed? If they loved him like they claimed to have, it wouldn't matter if he wasn't the same sadistic, prankster he once was. No, they were nothing but shameless fan girls who couldn't handle that their fairy tale was coming undone, and he didn't want to be around them anymore. Hikaru stopped running and started to walk. His shoulders felt heavy causing him to slouch. He could still hear his fan girls running, calling out for him, trying to find him. 'Apparently those stupid girls don't know how to listen.' he thought angry.

_Feels like the weight of the world,_

_Like all my screaming has gone unheard._

He walked through a door only to blink in realization that he walked into the Third Music Room. 'How long has it been since I was last in here?' he wondered briefly as he walked around the room. Flashes of memories coming to mind. He remembered the day after Kaoru's funeral, how he came up to the Host Club and told them he was quitting. They all had looked at him as if waiting for him to smile brightly and say: Just kidding! They didn't take his words seriously.

_And oh, I know you don't believe in me._

_Safe in the dark, how can you see?_

_Freefall, freefall, all through life._

Hikaru was lost in his own thought, that he didn't hear the door open. He didn't hear the small quiet foot steps that walked towards him. But he did feel the small slender hands that took his. "Leave me alone." he said quietly not looking to who it was that was holding him.

_If you love me, then let go of me._

_I won't be held down by who I used to be_

The hand tightened it's grip and for a moment, he thought it might have been Kaoru. He opened his eyes and turned his head to look.

_If you love me, then let go of me_

_I won't be held down by who I was_

But he was wrong. It wasn't Kaoru. Before him with a determind look on their face, was none other than the one person he didn't want to see more than anyone. Because seeing them was just as painful as the fact that Kaoru was dead. Before him was most likely the only person who could bring the old him back, but he wouldn't allow it.

_If you love me, then let go of me_

_I won't be held down by who I used to be_

"No Hikaru. I can't do that." Haruhi said as she held tight to his hand.


	2. Chapter 2: Where will you go?

**Hi there! DrawerDiary here, bringing you the second book in the Evanescence Chronicles. For those who haven't read the first one, I strongly suggest you go and do that. Now for those who have read it, it wasn't originally going to be part of a series, but i just couldn't leave it as it was and I didn't want to add a second chapter. So instead what I'm doing is creating a series of moments reflecting on Hikaru and those around him after Kaoru's death. Hope you Like it! **

**In the last chapter, the song was Weight of the World, this next song is Where will you go? Both done by Evanescence.**

**Oh yeah Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran High School Host Club, nor that band/song.**

Haruhi walked down the hallway looking for a quiet place to eat her lunch. She could hear girls crying out but didn't pay attention to what they were saying. Most likely Tamaki was doing something stupid and ridiculous. She sighed and decided there would only be one place in this school that was quiet now these days. Haruhi made her way up the stairs until she made it to the Third Music Room. It hadn't been the same since Kaoru died. And even more when Hikaru quite. Of course club activities still went on, but... it just didn't feel the same to her. The others felt the same way. 'But what do you expect? Of course it's going to be different if one of the members died.' Haruhi thought logically. She opened the door and took a step inside only to stop and blink when she saw a familiar figure in the room. 'Hikaru.' she walked over to him quickly as she could. She grasped his hand and looked at him, waiting for his response.

"Leave me alone." he said quietly, not even looking at her.

_You're too important for anyone_

Haruhi frowned slightly and tightened her hold of his hand. He opened his eyes and looked at her, giving Haruhi the opportunity to read his emotions. It was Disappointment at first, then it quickly went to surprise. Than fear. But that didn't make any sense. Why would he be afraid. "No Hikaru. I cant do that." she told him sternly, determination on her face. As the words came out his face went back to being plank. as if he didn't really care, but Haruhi knew better.

_You play the role of all you long to be  
But I, I know who you really are_

Haruhi pulled Hikaru over to one of the couches and set him down, before sitting down herself. She opened the hankercheif that was closed around the bento she made her self and took out a rice ball. "Hungry?" she asked handing it out to him. He as about to decline when his stomach made a growl so loud, it put Winny the Pooh's to shame.

"Uh... sure." Hikaru said quietly, with a light tint of pink shading his cheeks. He went out to reach for the riceball when Haruhi spotted something she did not like.

"What happened to your hand?" she asked grabbing it quickly. She didn't notice it before, but the knuckles were scratched up and cut. Hikaru panicked a little and pulled his hand back out of her grasp.

"I... punched a mirror." he said quietly, almost too quiet for Haruhi to hear. Keyword was almost. Haruhi starred at him unsure of what to say. She knew he was taking this harder than anyone, but still...

"Why did you punch a mirror?" she asked him taking the hand back into hers and inspecting it. Checking to see if there was any glass in the healing wounds. She looked up at him when she was finished with her inspection, waiting for his answer. It was then that she noticed his eyes were slightly puffy, and his cheeks and tear stains on them.

_You're the one who cries when you're alone_

Hikaru only ever showed how he was feeling to only two people. Herself, and Kaoru. Other than that he hides it all inside or does it when no ones around. "Hikaru." She took her other hand and gentle touched his cheek. He flinched and quickly scooted away, cradling his hand close to him.

'It's nothing." he said simply not looking at her. She frowned at this.

_But where will you go  
With no one left to save you from yourself?_

"Hikaru." she said again, only more sternly. "Why did you punch a mirror?" She glared at him, waiting for him to get teh damn courage to answer her.

_You can't escape_

_You can't escape._

"It doesn't matter!" Hikaru yelled. He was hating this day more and more.

"Yes it dose!" Haruhi yelled back. She could already feel the on coming headache from his childish antics.

"How? How dose it matter!? All I did was punch a god damn mirror! Okay? It doesn't matter! I did it cause I felt like it!" He stood up and looked at Haruhi with fiery eyes. His whole body was shaking. Haruhi looked back at him and watched him carefully. She wasn't fooled by his words. She could tell there was a reason behind it. She knew Hikaru all too well. She could tell he was scared.

_You think that I can't see right through your eyes  
Scared to death to face reality_

She stood up and faced him. Trying to figure out what was going on inside his mind. Trying to hear the words that weren't being spoken.

_No one seems to hear your hidden cries__  
You're left to face yourself alone,__  
But where will you go (where will you go)  
With no one left to save you from yourself_

Haruhi softened her gaze and took a step towards Hikaru. "Hikaru, does this have to do with Kaoru?" she asked in a gentle voice. Hikaru's eyes widened for a moment before he took a step back and glared at her. "Aw." she said in a knowing tone. "So that's why."

"Shut up!" Hikaru yelled. "You don't know anything!" he looked away from her, not being able to handle looking at her gaze any longer. He just couldn't. It was too much for him.

_You can't escape  
The truth_

"Then help me understand." Haruhi said walking over to him. She wasn't going to take no for an answer. "Explain to me why you hit the mirror! Why Kaoru has to do with it all!"

"Shut up! Just shut up! Stop trying to act as if you care! As if you understand how I feel!" Haruhi's eyes widened as she starred at him. She looked at his trembling body and understood what he meant. It wasn't really of her trying to find out what was wrong, it was more of the fact he couldn't say it. He wasn't able to morph the words. He was too frightened.

_I realize you're afraid (I realize)_

"Hikaru-"

"No! Stay away! Do you hear me!? Stay away!"

_But you can't abandon everyone_

"No Hikaru, I won't stay away!" Haruhi said as she walked right up to him, just barley not touching him. "You need to face the world! You know I'm right! You know you can't run from everyone! Inside, you don't even want to hide!"

_You can't escape  
You don't want to escape_

"Shut up!" Tears started to fall down his cheeks. Hikaru backed away until his back was against the wall. Haruhi walked up to him still.

"Hikaru you can't push everyone out." she said gentlely. "There are people who care about you, who want to help you get through this." She sighed when he didn't answer her. She knew she wasn't getting throuhg to him.

_I'm so sick of speaking words that no one understands__  
Is it clear enough that you can't live your whole life all alone?__  
I can hear you when you whisper  
But you can't even hear me screaming_

She quickly picked up on his quiet whispers. "No one understands what I'm going through. They all think they do but they don't! No one can understand what it was like for me to lose Kaoru. too lose the one part of me that everyone loved."

"No Hikaru. I don't understand. But you be damn wrong if you think you're the only one suffering. Kaoru was our friend. Losing him hit us all hard." She was being loud again, it was the only time he seemed to notice she was even there. 'Better than nothing.' she thought. 'At least I'm getting somewhere with him. If no one tries to help him... who knows what could happen.' She wasn't about to lose another friend.

_Where will you go (where will you go)  
With no one left to save you from yourself  
You can't escape  
The truth_

"I know but- But it's different with Kaoru and me! You guys- you wouldn't understand! You don't know what it's like facing the world by yourself, when you're so used to having someone by your side!"

_I realize you're afraid (I realize)_

"Who said you had to face the world alone?" Haruhi asked. She took his injured hand and guided him out of the music room.

"H-Haruhi? What are you doing?" Hikaru asked frightened.

"Having you face the world."

_But you can't reject the whole world_

Hikaru starred at Haruhi as she dragged him down the stairs and into their class room, just before the bell rang for class. The next thing he knew, he was sitting in his chair with Haruhi right by him, just like it used to be. only now, on the othoer side of her, was an empty desk. He could feel all the eyes on him, making him want to run and hide. But he couldn't move. Almost as if something was keeping him in his seat. A something that went by the names of Haruhi Fujioka, and her truthful words.

_You can't escape  
You won't escape  
You can't escape  
You don't want to escape_

**Well that's it for book two. I know it's not as good as the first one, or even this chapter wan't as good as the first, but well it was as good as I could make it at teh moment. Book three will be comming your way in the bnear future! Please review what you thought of this. Pwetty please.**


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